"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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