i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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