I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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