Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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