I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
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he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
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What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I am one with the molecules
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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