Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
