She said her name was "party"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
did i just pee glitter
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
