I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
We left an ass print on the piano.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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