is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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