It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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