try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize