yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
this boner is exhausting
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
