She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Randomize
