so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
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He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
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Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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