My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
All I want is dick and wine.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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