do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
