I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop