Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  with your own penis?

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  (248): with your own penis? http://tfl.nu/apjm
  Replies (7) Good night (3137) Bad night (1039)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm not a mortal combat character

  (410): View more from Maryland

  but my vagina is

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  (860): I'm not a mortal combat character (410): but my vagina is http://tfl.nu/01am
  Replies (16) Good night (1485) Bad night (588)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  she has no idea who harrison ford is.

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s

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  (641): she has no idea who harrison ford is. (617): see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s http://tfl.nu/0yb7
  Replies (52) Good night (743) Bad night (3564)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.

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  (847): I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto. http://tfl.nu/j5p7
  Replies (56) Good night (3700) Bad night (1329)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.

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  (281): i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night. http://tfl.nu/0cve
  Replies (71) Good night (1590) Bad night (6360)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.

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  (213): dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring. http://tfl.nu/vd81
  Replies (14) Good night (4501) Bad night (1317)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.

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  (732): Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful. http://tfl.nu/p1yf
  Replies (3) Good night (853) Bad night (2768)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee

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  (425): come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee http://tfl.nu/e993
  Replies (15) Good night (1859) Bad night (750)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.

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  (413): I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD. http://tfl.nu/g1bn
  Replies (6) Good night (1294) Bad night (542)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.

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  (317): You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow. http://tfl.nu/p8o5
  Replies (7) Good night (1627) Bad night (673)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday

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  (616): She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday http://tfl.nu/c1kw
  Replies (5) Good night (1222) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack

  (1-315): View more from New York

  This is why I love you...

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  (315): Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack (1-315): This is why I love you... http://tfl.nu/jq03
  Replies (5) Good night (920) Bad night (262)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only

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  (647): You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only http://tfl.nu/xu5w
  Replies (11) Good night (423) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.

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  (563): Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful. http://tfl.nu/zyvu
  Replies (2) Good night (648) Bad night (235)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.

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  (724): Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful. http://tfl.nu/ekml
  Replies (1) Good night (355) Bad night (356)

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