Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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