How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
why is half of my head shaved?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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