I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
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