So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
