It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
