u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
My breasts were aching with rage.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
