how hairy? two words: wookie tits
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
