1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I don't deserve a penis
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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