Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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