yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
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How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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