I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
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I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
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You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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