Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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