Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
