I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I came so hard my ears popped.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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