u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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