i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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