brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I CAN MOONWALK!
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
