Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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