i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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