Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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