If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
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He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
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