was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
