I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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