Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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