She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Randomize