Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
