so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
