420 ftw
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I believe in your delicious
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
