My first STD was from a foam party
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
