why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
