i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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