when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
