now i know why i became what i already was.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
