bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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