Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
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